"My people are great admirers of earth culture," Will said. "So sophisticated- considering your rather backward technological development and the mess you've made of the planet. So they decided to send an expedition to study your culture, from the inside as it were.
"Unfortunately, not everything went to plan. Our sources suggested that York would be a good place to start our research- a city of much history and culture. But the landing was a little- awkward."
"You botched it," Zoe said. "You know that funnel shaped lump of metal outside Wentworth? The one they say is modern sculpture? That was our main weapons attachment. And those weird balls of cogs near Goodrick? And the bent bits of metal on the hill next to the lake? And-"
"Yes, I think they get the picture," Will interrupted. "I did my best. I didn't want to land on any ducks."
"You should have let me do it," Zoe complained.
"I passed my pilot's licence three years before you," Will said. "Anyway, we landed, and began our research. We had a year to complete our work. To start with we weren't having much luck, then I saw a poster advertising your summer show and thought it might be worth joining your society as a way of getting close to people and being able to experience Earth live. It worked, too. I got no end of useful information. So in October Jegsdda decided to join too. Everything was going so well, it seemed a shame we'd have to leave at the end of February- as your calendar describes it."
"But- hang on," Tom said. "Are you saying that Central Hall only appeared on campus last Easter? Because it didn't, it's been there forty years! I've been at York uni for the last 6 and I've been in it loads of times before last March..."
"Indeed it has been there forty years," Will said, smiling. "You see our technology is rather more advanced than yours. Once we had identified York uni as a suitable base for our research, we used our temporal drive to send the ship back in time to when the campus was being built. So it has been there all this time, the memories you have are real. But you do not see all of the ship- certain parts have been hidden. Hidden right where everyone can see them, just unnoticed, accepted as part of the building, little quirks that no one bothers to explain. Like the fact that you all knew there was a storage space in the roof of the building- but that no one ever knows what is kept there. Like the fact that the plans of the hall show blank areas labelled "ventilationplenium " and "plant" but no one ever knows quite what they are for. All those strange little quirks that don't make sense. For example, in all the times you've been in here, have you ever seen the bar open before now?"
They all shook their heads. "I suppose that explains why the acoustics are so odd," Patrick said, trying to produce a smile in the tension.
"And the electrics," said Bill. "Even the porters and technicians don't understand them."
"You mean you can travel in time?" Tom asked in amazement.
"Not people," Zoe replied. "That's far too dangerous. But inanimate objects, yes. We sent the ship back in time, but we stayed now. And of course the ship was here too, because it would still be here when it got to now."
"I see," said Tom slowly. As a physicist, he found the idea interesting and challenging. But there were more important things to worry about.
"Can you take us back?" Emma asked.
"I'm afraid not," Will said.
"What!"
"Well, not now, at least," Will said. "Entering the atmosphere of a planet is difficult and dangerous- I'm sure you know that. As you probably guessed, our suspension is somewhat in need of repair- if anything goes wrong with the landing this time it would really go wrong and we could smash the ship and kill everyone on board. And even if we could land, I'm not sure whether we'd have enough fuel to lift off again. But as well as all that- Zoe and I can't go home without you. If we land, we'll probably never take off again, and we want to get back to Bognor."
"You mean we can't get home?"
"No. I'm afraid not."
"Don't you have some kind of emergency craft?"
"Of course. It's what you've always thought was the lift. But you won't all fit in it."
"So we're trapped."
"I'm afraid so."
Several people had already been on the verge of tears. This was just too much. Everyone was afraid, everyone was tense.
"Why did you do this to us?" shouted Sarah.
"It was part of our research," Will said. "It was a condition of our funding. We were to bring back some, er, specimens."
"Specimens? We're specimens for your research?"
"Not just that," Will said hurriedly. "Cultural consultants, if you like. We will return you home eventually. We want to learn from you,to understand how your society works."
"What, the Gilbert and Sullivan society?"
"Why us?" Emma asked.
"Well, like I said...you're a society. You can teach us how to run our society..."
"I think you've got confused between society, as in a club, and society as in a culture and...oh what the hec, it really doesn't matter," Ernest said. "So that's why you hypnotised us; so you could kidnap us and take us off to your planet."
"We'd thought it would be best, would cause you all less trauma. You wouldn't know what was happening until we were well out of danger. But that didn't quite go to plan- I overlooked you four." He indicated Ruth, Patrick, Tom and Adam. "And I didn't realise that you'd fought quite that much- you must be very strong-minded. And it took longer than we were expecting to prepare for take off. We wanted it to take place during boredom, and then while your minds were open, bored, I'd give a command, just before take off, for you to go to sleep, and you would. Then when we were out in deep space I'd wake you up- probably not all at once, just in case- explain the situation, and everything would be ok. We didn't want to have to use force to get you to come, we hoped that once you were presented with a fait accompli you would agree to come along for a while."
"It doesn't look like we have a choice," Ernest said.
"What do you mean, use force?" David said. "Your weapon doesn't work."
"That one doesn't," Zoe replied. "We do have more than one. And before you get any ideas, they're hidden and locked away."
"So we're not just trapped," Patrick said. "We're prisoners."
The story continues...
No comments:
Post a Comment